March 26, 2011

I hayte why't peepull

Holy FUCKING shit.

March 9, 2011

Space Boot

So, I finally have done it. After drinking since I was 13, I finally managed to hurt myself bad enough to where I required medical attention. I must say though, I think I've had a pretty good run of accident-free drinking. 

How did this happen? I was drunk and in hooker heels. I am apparently incapable of navigating said heels over a patch of acorns and grass. I ate shit outside of my apartment at 3 am, and laid in the fetal position laughing, crying and  trying not to piss myself for a good 5 minutes. 

I am now sporting the sexiest walking cast ever, and walking with a pimp-limp . 

My life is awesome.